Saturday, August 29, 2009

The Truth Behind Stereotypes

(...background music by Keri Hilson's, 'Knock You Down'...)

We are always being generalized into categories and often we do not like it. Like for example, "Malays are lazy". Can you imagine the amount of people that is going to dislike this statement? However, the origin of these 'categories' must came from some incident in history or is it just some propaganda by a certain group of people who wish to see the demise of others?

So, I came across this hilarious video on Youtube from Singapore. The video is performed by a famous stand up comedian from Singapore who is a drag queen. Well to those that get easily offended, it is not for you. As I was curious with the video, I keep on watching all the available videos. To me this person is clever in the sense that he managed to push the boundaries of race sensitivity without going overboard and sound vulgar.

As I was watching there were a few comments related to the Malays (as I am one) which to me are true. This is related to the fact that the majority of people doing rehab is the Malay. The ones that is still behind in the economy and also education is also the Malay. If this such a statement is being made in our country, definitely there is going to be hell to pay! The Malay will go to the streets and cause commotion to express their anger. There will also be harsh statements being made in the media condemning the insensitivity of the stand up comedian towards other race.

Don't get me wrong. I am proud to be Malay but please step back and look at the big picture. Are we, the Malays, really improving our way of living whether economy or education? Why is it that we need to have a certain 'advantage' then we are able to be competitive?

Therefore before we go get all emotional, please ask ourselves whether are we really OK? and also what can I contribute to help our own race? Please have a perspective on the current condition and ask yourselves whether you are capable to stand on your own two feet?


Monday, August 24, 2009

Oh Fudge!

(...background music from OST Hairspray, 'I Know Where I've Been...)

A radio conversation:
X: "Me call back"
Me: "Yup"
X: "Can you spend more time in the control room? This is requested by a lot of people. This is to help with the coordination"
Me: "Uhh...OK"

Today was a very challenging and a very testing day. Today was the day my threshold was tested. Unfortunately, it started early in the morning when I found out that certain items were not updated when an adjacent part of the control room was upgraded. Then it was added on with an absurd question by the project team on a certain changes of the project scope that need to be in place whereas I am not even an effing full time project team member. Fueled further by the radio conversation which was depressing as (in his defence) people do not know that I have to attend to other important and urgent things that are within my responsibility or just given to me. And the icing on the cake was when somebody made a decision on my work scope without even consulting me and yeah! IT WAS A BLOODY STUPID DECISION, in which I had to rectify.

I was at the point of my limits that I almost shouted to a contractor and also a colleague of mine. The tone of my voice was a little bit high and was at the point of waiting for anyone to cross me just to give an excuse for me to go medieval on the a-hole's ass.

The saddest of them all, this would be my third time doing this and when you thought that you have gone through all sorts of things to make sure that at other time it would be smooth, it was totally the effing opposite.Son of a motherf&%$#@!!!!! I am so totally disappointed with myself that, I should have taken control of the situation. Sadly, the situation took control over me and made me overwhelm with the situation.


Tomorrow is a new day. Praise the Lord! I am sure that tomorrow the sun will shine and I know where I've been...


Sunday, August 23, 2009


(...background music by Taylor Swift's You Belong With Me...)

Ramadhan is here again. I am all excited (although I did not really show it) about the arrival of the holiest of all the months. I truly believe in doing things sincerely to get God's blessings (not making excuses) and not just because everyone is doing it. But I have started with the fasting but the other 'side dishes' is yet to come. So today, will try my best to perform Tarawikh and also the reciting of Quran.

So, in conjunction with this month, I was thinking on writing this topic (which I have thought for a long time). It is just about feeling empathy about people around us. This got me thinking as I was caught in the most awkward situation. For those who are not familiar, the place where I work, we are provided transportation to go from one place to another in our working premises. Basically these van drivers are at our backing call.

So in this one scenario, where I was in the van together with a colleague of mine were in the van talking until we reached to our destination. At the stop, I went down and said thank you to the driver and also threw a smile at the driver. The driver reciprocate with a nod and a smile also. As we walked to the door, this colleague asked a question, "Why did you say thank you?". I was liked, "Why? Is it wrong to say that?". The person replied, "No. Why say thank you to someone who is actually doing what he is being paid for?".

What the fudge?!!! I was dumbfounded by that statement. Believe it or not, these service providers are also human beings with feelings and issues (although they are being paid for). We will bitch like hell, if we were under appreciated by our superiors saying that, "The boss does not understands me" or "He is an a-hole for not rewarding my hard work" etc...

I believe this is what lacking in our society. We need to be more empathetic to the other people and stop being a self-indulgence-narcissistic-bitch all the time. Try to recall the feeling of being appreciated by others and try to reciprocate to the rest of the world. Basically, pay it forward. If we truly want to change the world, this to me is the easiest way to start.


Thursday, August 20, 2009


(...background music courtesy of Kelly Clarkson, 'Already Gone'...)

Lately I have been arrogant and also egoistic. This is not the kind of person that I am striving to be. This never crossed my mind until today...

Today something happened to me which was kind of stupid. Not the thing that I should do. But due to the idea that I am invincible, I did it anyway. Well was I in for a surprise. I was finally caught and that was really embarrassing.

Contemplating on the incident will not help me to grow as a human being. What I need to do is try to learn from it. At the end of the day, how well known you are, there are still people who does not care about your star power. Salute the person who did his job and shame on me for not following the rules.

My pledge from today onwards is to walk the talk. I need to!


Thursday, August 6, 2009

How Do I Move From Here?

(...background music "Mama Do by Pixie Lott"...)

As you go on the journey of exploring every angle of life, you would think that you have figured everything out. You would tell yourself that life is so routine that you are getting bored. But the universe has the tendency to throw you a curve ball from time to time. And when this happens, you are either prepared or not. In my case it was so fast that I was still in denial towards this moment of writing this.

When the ball approaches you, it was something off guard. Therefore it raises the question, "should I go through life worrying that something will go wrong or believe that what happens have its reasons?". Although what happened did not affect me directly but it does until now traumatize me. The vision is still playing in my head, haunts me. There will be moments in a day that I felt a pool of tears building up.

So, how do I move from here? Will everything be back to normal? What is normal anyways? As I am good at putting a brave face as to ensure to all that I am fine, but I am not sure until when I can suppress all this.