Tuesday, February 16, 2010

I Am NO Expert, but HEY This Is Just My Two Cents

(...background music "Fame" from the Fame Soundtrack...)

Politics really puzzle me. I seriously cannot figure out what is it all about? This is because if you were to attend any of the talks given by the political body, they seem to be talking about the same thing. The other team SUCK!! I had postponed many times about writing anything related to politics but I just cannot take it anymore. This is basically on the front page of the news. Nothing much but just the other bad mouthing the other.

This so called political turmoil started well, if you are in this country you would know when. With the starting of a new political entity, the drama begun. Never ending ill stories about an individual or a political entity. You can call me on the fence, but I am not attracted to any sides. This is what I have decided as a child.

You may wonder, how did I come to this conclusion even when I was a child. Well this is from where I come from the politician only paid attention to the constituents when election is near. After winning the seat, it will be effing difficult to see that politician in my area. It raised a question, "Aren't they suppose to be serving us? That is why they were elected". You know that election is near when the roads were brand new again. Unfortunately the mentality is all about the perks that come with the title. I was so and still am disappointed and angry at the same time. This is not what it should be.

Currently what is happening in the country after the last election, is that some changes are being demanded. Therefore a shift was seen. Unfortunately, same thing is being seen. Drama...drama...drama. It is all about an individual or a political party. They have forgotten the most important thing. They have forgotten about the people that have put them there! They are so caught up with themselves that they have forgotten about the importance of the people in their constituents.

When will the people issues be the priority rather than putting the opposition down. In my opinion, rather than 'killing' each other, start to see the big picture. You are given the responsibility to voice the issues that is of importance to the people. And please for God's sakes, stop talking about things that have been clearly stated in the Constitutions and move on. There is a reason why they are there in the first place, go check the history books.

Guys this is a ENORMOUS responsibility, please do not let us, the people, down.


Am I Mental?

(...background music "Jai Ho" from Slumdog Millionaire's Soundtrack...)

I have noticed something about myself that I tend to ignore previously. I have this persona when I am in Bintulu and another persona when I am in KL. When come to to think of it, both really represents me.

When I am in Bintulu, I am more chilled and more wanting to blend in with the crowd. I have learned the language spoken here just to get accepted by the locals. Which in the end I have managed by a tooth to blend in. Some locals even thought that I am actually local. A gargantuan complement for me.

However, when I board the flight MH2742 heading to KL, in the middle of the South China Sea, I transformed. I transformed into this snooty, think-that-he-is-classy persona which can be pretty annoying. When people converse with me in Malay, I tend to respond in English. This is the truth! I am actually surprised when I realized it recently. I tend to mock this people and yet I am one of them.

There is one word that could explain this. BIPOLAR!! But really??!! Am I bipolar or just plain crazy?? I have not actually know how to handle this as this just struck me recently. So wait for my next update when I board that flight. Until then...


Sunday, February 7, 2010

What The Hell Is Wrong With Me?

(...background music "Smells Like Teen Spirit by RHM feat. Shanade...)

This is entry is for me to figure what is wrong with me? Lately I am easily irritated and angry on things that did not happen as I expected. I am so worried about this as my limit was at its end. Thank God for the meeting in KL, which helped me to cool off.

It all started when I started to settle down in my new home. There were certain things that need to be settled at the old house and I felt that I was doing everything myself. Why are not the others helping me?

Then followed by people at work. This again is my fault. I set a very high standard on myself as an engineer. I expect that I should know the basic things and also the process of the plant that I am currently working with. On top of that, I also make sure that anything urgent and a priority, the asset owner will be aware of every single update. Unfortunately there are certain engineers who decided just to be present at work.

Present at work is what I call someone who just come to work for the sake of coming to work and has no desire to contribute. I am pissed with this type of people. In my opinion, there is no excuse that you are still a new engineer. This is because I was once a new engineer but I need to grow up quickly because there were lots of people depended on me.

Is it wrong to have the same expectation on the rest of the new engineers? I am not being unreasonable. After looking at things that made me damn angry, I realized that I am bothering myself with things that are beyond my control.

This contributes to lots of sleepless nights and stressful days. I know what to do. Always give 200% of myself to my work. Do not bother about the others. If to a certain point it irritates me beyond my threshold, I am going to give a piece of my mind. I plan not to keep it bottled up inside like what I am doing now. It is so not healthy.